In Honor of Those Who Battle Infertility

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Unsung Lullabies- Infertility Awareness 2016- Corpus Christi Moms Blog

Each Infertility Awareness Month I read stories from all over the country of unsung lullabies and women who were BOLD, BRAVE and transparent in their stories of how they became mothers. I am seriously in AWE of these fellow Mamas.

As we continue on this road of life, there are so many curves in the road that we never expect to have to take. Of course, no one expects to have difficulty having children or that they are going to have a miscarriage. We all think that when we are “ready” {is there really such a thing?} to have a family that it is just magically going to happen. Clearly from all of the stories shared, that is simply not the case.

Reading the stories of how much women have gone through, the tears cried, being poked and prodded, so many doctor appointments, feelings of failure, strain on friendships, strain on marriages, and ultimate feelings of defeat I can’t help but pray from this past week that we are all more open on the conversation of miscarriage and infertility. The mom or dad in these scenarios has done NOTHING wrong. Nothing you did or could have done changes what you have gone through or are going through and in no way shape or form should moms walk through this alone.

I have not personally struggled with infertility, nor had a miscarriage, but we are not done trying to grow our family, so there is no telling what the future holds for future pregnancies. But I can tell you moms that have struggled with infertility that I am amazed by you.

I am amazed that you can continue to FIGHT. You continue to fight for the unborn, and if you have chosen to go the foster or adoption route, you continue to fight by loving the unloved, for which you can never be repaid.

In the past couple of years some of my nearest and dearest friends have suffered with infertility and miscarriage. Walking through these times with them is making my computer hard to see through the tears.

I am hurting for them, alongside them, and trying to do my best to love them with all I have.

I know I do not know the same pain and I may never know that pain, but what I do know is that from the second they told me they were trying or shared with me that they were pregnant, I loved that baby. I loved knowing that baby could be best friends with my little girl, I couldn’t wait to see their face and the squishy little toes. I couldn’t wait to see the joy in the mom’s and dad’s faces as they got to show their precious bundle of joy off for the very first time. When they didn’t get to do that, my heart broke with them.

My family is pretty small. There aren’t any aunts or uncles, so our friends, have become our family. And that baby, or the baby we are praying for, is a part of that family as well.

Infertility Awareness- Corpus Christi Moms Blog

I have seen my very, very best friend struggle to become pregnant, and instead of laying down in defeat {though many tears were shared together and apart,} she and her husband took on the bold, brave, most selfless act of foster care. She and her husband are fighting for those babies. She spent HOURS at the hospital, literally all day holding a precious little boy before she could take him home. She has lost so much sleep over what is to come of his future, but resting in the fact that he is safe with them today and that is all that matters. They have taken him to see beautiful parts of the country, and they have completely and wholly loved him without abandon. I am in awe.

getting to see the world
Getting to see the world

 

As my other dear friends dealt with miscarriage, I was at a loss for words. From the second you find out you are pregnant, you can’t help but plan out the nursery, the baby’s name, wonder if its a boy or girl, buy clothes, start stocking up on diapers, and the list goes on and on.  When that planning comes to a tragic end there is not a word of comfort out there.

Seeing them suffer such a loss was so hard. To know that they were in such pain. They had so many questions. They were sad and angry. Even their husbands didn’t have the right words. I saw them struggle to see other babies, and even if they had other children, the last thing they wanted to hear was, “at least your already have one.” There were so many highs and lows but I was and am constantly blown away by their strength, even in tears and confusion. How I long for them to know how much we loved those precious babies as well, and we can not wait to see them one day sitting in the lap of Jesus.

A tribute to our friends baby Laine who went to be with Jesus at 6 weeks 1 day
A tribute to our friends’ baby, Laine, who went to be with Jesus at 6 weeks and 1 day old.

I pray that through reading the courageous stories last week we can all become more aware of what people {moms and dads} are going through, that always asking, “So when are you going to have kids?” may not always be the best question to ask, and that we can make those who have lost a baby- no matter the age- know how much we loved them as well, and that we are mourning alongside you.

Thank you. Thank you to all of you moms, from all over our great country, for sharing your heart and giving other moms who struggle with infertility the knowledge that they are not alone.

In honor of National Infertility Awareness Week, we are dedicated to raising awareness and educating our community about the varying types of infertility and the many options available. Our hope is that this series opens, provides inspiration, and moves us all to a deeper sense of compassion. So, please join us as real local moms open up and share their stories all throughout the week.

Read more Infertility Awareness stories and perspectives from Corpus Christi area moms.