My son was born at exactly 36 weeks. He came into this world an entire month early, by surprise…
On August 13, 2012 I was at my grandmother’s house showering and getting ready for bed. Our apartments’ hot water was out and we needed to take showers. Suddenly, I realized something was really wrong. I had some slight cramping and started bleeding uncontrollably. At 36 weeks, I knew that was not suppose to happen. Quickly, my husband and grandparents helped me to the car and rushed me to the emergency room.
I was the woman who said, “I’m going to have a natural birth, I do not want a c-section, what-so-ever, and everything will go smoothly without complications.” But…within 30 minutes, all of those dreams changed.
I heard the doctor telling my husband I was bleeding too much due to a placental abruption. Additionally, he was unable to break my water. I couldn’t have a natural birth… I was a guaranteed C-section.
When I heard that, I started to panic. My blood pressure shot up and baby’s heart-rate dropped. Since, I had never had major surgery in my entire life, I became a complete mess. What I did hear was the doctor clearly stating, “this isn’t about you anymore. Your baby is going to die if we do not get him out.” My heart sank.
Due to the medications I was given, I was in and out of sleep throughout my entire c-section. I was only allowed to see my baby’s face for about 5 seconds after he was born because they had to take him and check his vitals and oxygen levels.
My son was born August 13, 2012 at 11:59pm at 4lbs. 7oz.
As soon as my husband told me how small our baby boy was, I passed completely out. The doctor gave me magnesium sulfate after our son was born to help bring down my extremely high blood pressure. I did not hold our baby for almost two days after his birth. The medication made me loopy and I had no control over my own body. I feared in my weakness I would drop him.
Our sweet boy was in the NICU for only one day in order to watch his oxygen levels. After 24 hours, he was released to us in our room. My mother stayed with my husband, the baby, and me. After all, I had signed a form stating I wanted him in the room with us if HE had no complications. He was so tiny, but was perfectly healthy and ready to go home… even though I wasn’t. As new parents, we needed someone who knew what to do to help make sure our tiny little man was taken care of to our liking. My mom tried her best to do that.
Our baby was so tiny. I put his first set of preemie clothes on him… and they were way, too, big! I was terrified of this tiny ball of fire!
We stayed in the hospital for about six days and finally got to take our little guy home. Never in my life did I think I would have a preemie. We had so many family and friends that offered to help, but I was so scared to let them because he was so small. My anxieties took over some and I was fearful of even the closest people to me holding him, or even keeping him for me so I could have some rest.
My mind knew I could trust those people, but my heart was so scared.
The most important part of everything that I have learned with a preemie… they are VERY strong. Let your family and friends help. If I ever am in that position again I will definitely take the help when offered. If you have fears, let those people know that you are nervous. Make sure they know exactly how you want your infant held, fed, changed, etc. They are there for you… take the love and help that is offered. My mom was amazing and asked for everything I wanted for my son, and if I had no clue…she let me know what she would do. Anyone you are close to can be that backbone in helping you make sure your baby gets the best care possible.