Leaving My Baby to Teach Other Children: A Timeline


 5:15 a.m. : How is it already 5:15 a.m.? That 2:00 a.m. feeding is brutal; I can’t wait for this kid to start sleeping through the night.

5:45 a.m. : Fifteen minutes till my alarm goes off.

5:55 a.m. : Five minutes

5:57 a.m. : Three minutes

5:59 a.m. : One minute

6:00 a.m. : Dang it.

6:05 a.m. : Why am I going back? Who’s idea was this? Right. My bank account told me I needed to go back. It’s forgotten what money looks like.

6:15 a.m. : Can I just stay in this shower all day? It’s warm in here. And quiet. I miss quiet.

6:27 a.m. : At least I get to wear makeup again. Dodging people I know at HEB because I look like a troll is getting annoying.

6:35 a.m. : We meet again, maternity pants. This c-section scar is still crazy tender and there is no way I’m going to try to squeeze myself into my pre pregnancy professional dress pants. I don’t need that mental trauma this early in the morning. Coffee. I DO need coffee.

6:44 a.m. : What?! No coffee?! When did this happen?! I bought a new can last week! Riiiiight, this weekend’s Screamapalooza was of epic proportions. I basically had a coffee drip straight into my veins. I’ll have to get some from the community coffee pot at school. Though, I better hurry before Mr. Schaefer pours it all into his giant Stripes cup.

7:05 a.m. : Great, running late. Guess this means no breakfast.  Maybe there’s leftover Christmas candy hiding in my desk somewhere. Am I wearing two different shoes?!

7:15 a.m. : Spends ten minutes saying goodbye to the sleeping baby.

7: 27 a.m. : Ugh! Move it, slow red car! I don’t have time for your pokey shenanigans this morning! I need to beat Schaefer to the coffee!

7:40 a.m. : Whew, made it! Sure my hair is only half dry and I need a caffeine fix, but I’m here, ready to go, and totally NOT missing my baby.

7:42 a.m. : Nope. Wrong. I miss my baby.

7:48 a.m. : Yes! Thank you sweet baby Jesus, there is coffee!

8:00 a.m. : Hello kids, I’m so happy to be back! Let’s get started with some math! What? How’s the baby? Proceeds to talk about baby for the next thirty minutes.

9:00 a.m. : Spends five minutes of silent reading time staring at framed picture of baby on classroom shelf. Changes computer monitor background to a picture collage made up of the cutest baby moments. Stares at that.


9:15 a.m. : Maybe I should text the babysitter and see how they are doing. No, not yet, it’s only been a few hours. Control yourself, woman!

10:05 a.m. : OK, it’s been a respectable amount of time. Now I can text!

10:10 a.m. : No response yet. I wonder if she’s doing the 10:00 feeding.

10:13 a.m. : Still no response….

10:25 a.m. : I texted TWENTY minutes ago, she should have responded by now!

10:30 a.m. : What’s going on?! For all that is good and holy, look at your phone!!!

10:32 a.m. : What if something’s wrong? Oh God! Is the house on fire?!?! Do I call 911?!?!

10: 35 a.m. : Cool, she texted back. Everything is fine. They went for a walk and she left her phone on the table. I wonder if she bundled up the baby, it’s a chilly 75 degrees this morning. But it’s also kind of sunny, I hope she had the stroller shade lowered.

11:05 a.m. : As a diversion tactic, the kids are asking to see pictures of the baby. I guess I can show them one… or twenty…

12:15 p.m.: Lunch. Scrolls through baby pictures on phone while eating lukewarm tomato soup. I wonder if he misses me….

12:16 p.m.: Wait. What if he thinks I’ve abandoned him?! That I’m never coming back? His tiny brain can’t comprehend things, all he knows is that I’m not there! I’m a terrible mother! Why did I leave my baby?!

12:20 p.m.: Cries in the faculty restroom.

12:43 p.m. : Recess time. Good, these sunglasses will hide the tears. Geez girl, pull yourself together!

1:00 p.m. : Husband just texted to see how I’m holding up. Just going to text “fine”, he’ll know I’m lying if I sound too positive. If I text the truth, I’ll have to go cry in the restroom again.

1:10 p.m.: The kids are at P.E., I’ll text the sitter and say I’ll be on my way home at 3:15. Maybe 3:00. Who am I kidding; I’m leaving with the kids at 2:45.

2:23 p.m. : Could time be going any slower?! Seriously!

2:30 p.m. : Fifteen minutes until school’s out.

2:40 p.m. : Five minutes…

2: 42 p.m. : Three minutes…

2: 44 p.m. : One minute…

2:45 p.m. : Yes! Line up at the door, kids. Grab your lunch boxes, do your homework, and don’t forget to read! OK, bye!

2: 49 p.m. : Makes a very questionable turn out of the school parking lot and starts the drive home quickly yet responsibly.

2:56 p.m. : Move it, ugly blue car! The speed limit is 65! 6-5!

3:10 p.m. : Pulls a little too fast into the driveway, knocking over two trash cans and scaring a neighborhood cat in the process. Runs to the door at a speed that could break a world record, rips open the door Hulk style and pounces on the baby.  Oh, my sweet, adorable child! I missed you so much! I’m never leaving you again! Well, until tomorrow…

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Emily and her husband belong to their one year-old son, Oliver, who selfishly takes up most of their time. When he deems to set Emily free, she goes off to her job as a 3rd grade teacher. Emily LOVES Harry Potter! It’s pretty much her identifier. (ex: Have you met Emily? She LOVES Harry Potter.) Things she hopes to do again someday include reading books for fun, sleeping, watching marathon TV shows, and spending hours wandering aimlessly around Target. Things she thought she would miss but doesn't include a quiet home, movie theaters, her little Honda Civic, and her general freedoms before motherhood.


  1. Darling sense of humor! I remember those days like they were yesterday even though my oldest is 31, and I worked in an office. I, too, stared at the clock all day.

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