The greatest thing we can create between our kids is a dialogue with us, so rather than getting the typical responses of “fine,” “it was boring,” “nothing” from your teens, try these out and feel a shift! I have compiled a list for you. Some tried and true, some recent editions, and some I’m eager to try out soon. Several should apply to boy-moms too. The activities I provided serve multiple purposes. Like all parents, I want to instill strong values, help my child discover her talents or passions, teach responsibility and independence, create a strong sense of self, and of course, have her feel secure in knowing I’m here for her no matter the circumstance. And of course, let’s have a little fun along the way!
Among Us: I’d describe the game as a modern who done-it. I’m not really a phone app game player, but the time spent together laughing or being laughed at rather was well worth the download. The game has a chat room where everyone gets to figure out who the imposters are. It was totally obvi- that my messaging style was way out-dated. Cue loads of tears from laughter rolling down our faces.
Baking: This activity is timeless. I’ve even learned a thing or two from the kiddo whose lemon-blueberry cake had friends and family requesting seconds and even lining up their birthday cake requests.
Cooking: Whether your kiddo has been by your side in the kitchen for years or not, cooking creates incredible moments, self-sufficiency, and the opportunity to pass down traditions. I’ve also seen a great sense of pride beam out of my kid after she has prepared her favorite recipes; her eggplant parmesan is top-notch btw.
Double Date: Need a girls night? Need some qt with the kid? Voila, team-up with another mother-daughter team for a double date. Please note, Alamo Drafthouse is not the spot for this venture as no one under 18 can be in the theater alone. I grew up in a small town. Nothing was better than going to the movies with my friends (heck we even went to the drive-in movie theater). Wanting to instill some independence, we decided to attend 2 movies (in neighboring theaters). It was fun, but it was almost a flop, as no one under 18 can be in the theater alone at Alamo Drafthouse. (our daughters are each over 5’8” and we there was a total occupancy of 4 in the theater)
Exercise: This hasn’t always been part of our routine. But I know I have to be the example. It can be challenging finding activities that both of us are mutually interested in, but at least exercise definitely serves lots of purposes for increased wellness and increased quality time. We got a basketball, we’re looking for new bikes (she’s outgrown hers), walks, a gym membership (hello ladies only room); we’re making strides and I’m so motivated for more!
Journaling: As a kid I had a really rough time talking to my parents (more my mom), so I would write her letters when we had a rough patch. And there will be so many rough patches in raising a teen. So now, I write letters to my teen in a journal when there’s an important message or difficult topic I want to discuss with her. I encourage her to write me back, but we’re still building up to that.
Make-up: Truth be told, I never was taught how to properly apply make-up. I’m more of a make-up novice. I grew up on “TLC’s What Not to Wear,” home of the 5 minute face. And that’s pretty much my regimen. And while I do dread to see teens (and tweens) with a full face. Every momma must cross that bridge someway, somehow. I’m still in the early stages where eyeliner, lashes, and gloss are allowed for those special occasions. Yet recently, I was delightfully surprised. In opening this door, I found that my daughter already holds lots of expertise to share. And I have to admit, my lashes are on point.
Message Board: This is a new one for us that I picked up from my personal growth coach. You need a board, sticky notes, and markers. Make two sections (one for you and one for her). The purpose is to write out things each of you wants. At first, it could be materialistic (that’s okay-consider it learning more about their short term goals). But slowly you can start shifting the conversation. Example: “I want people to treat each other with kindness!”
Movie Night: Cliche. I know. But I need to rave about our go-to spot, Movies Inc. Who can beat this quaint, local spot with $* tickets and a budget-friendly concession stand to boot. It’s never crowded (an important factor in the current climate). This year has opened the door to showcasing some classics; seeing Jaws on the big screen with my kiddo was a treasure.
Thrifting: I love discounts, resale shops, thrift shops, etc. This is nothing new. But some things are new now! For starters, we both can enjoy the same shops now like our recent find at Threads Resale Shop – a quirky beanie for her that said “S-E-R-I-O-U-S-L-Y!” And now she’s a more active participant in the money-spending and overall money habits conversation.
Spa Day at Home: This idea came about through the shocking discovery of asking the kiddo for ideas. As it turns out both of us had been wanting to do this together, but never had dedicated time to it, nor had an idea that the other was also interested.
Vision Boards: I’m anxiously awaiting for a class to open up on this one. Positivity! Goal setting! Hopes! Dreams! Inspiration!
Volunteering: Our kids are finally off the kids menu (sob), but at long last, they are of age to gain valuable experience and make an impact in the community alongside us. These local agencies accept help from teens (of course check for any COVID restrictions): Gulf Coast Humane Society, Coastal Bend Food Bank, Texas State Aquarium.
